When life is going great, most of us can stick to a plan. It’s easier to make better food choices, move more and generally keep doing all the things we know are good for us.
But if your life is anything like mine, it is rarely smooth sailing.
Stuff happens and life gets messy more often than I’d like it to. But that’s life, isn’t it?
One of my goals, both for myself and for the women I work with, is to create simple, time-efficient rituals and strategies that feel as effortless as possible. So when stressful and unexpected times happen, we can stay mostly on track because some healthy habits have simply become part of our life, almost like brushing our teeth.
I’ve been given a rude wake-up call over the last month or so.
Before that, I was feeling pretty good about some of the habits I’d been creating. But apparently I needed to be tested to see what had really become part of my life and what couldn’t cope with a big dose of unexpected stress.
Honestly, I was a bit annoyed to find that not all my newer healthy habits were as ingrained as I thought they were.
But unlike the past, when I would have been totally annoyed at myself for not being perfect, this time I’ve tried to look at it all with curiosity.
What keeps going without me having to think too much about it? And what disappears?
My morning walk has stayed. It definitely seems to be a 99% of the time thing for me now. I’ve also still done a little running because I find it really good for stress relief. My usual breakfast has stayed, along with my daily matcha latte.
But a few other things have fallen by the wayside.
Strength training has been really hard. I’ve generally still made it into the gym a one or two times a week, but sometimes I’ve really just been moving rather than doing any heavier strength work.
I feel like stress has depleted so much of my energy that I haven’t had the capacity for the focus and concentration heavier lifting requires. I can manage my go-to kettlebell and medicine ball slam workout which I find easy, but things like deadlifts and squats have definitely been on the backburner.
Food has been interesting too.
Normally I’ll have a salad, vegetable soup or something similar for lunch. When I’m stressed, I seem to revert to a very standard combination:
Bread, chocolate and kombucha…
They are definitely my middle-of-the-day go-tos in times of stress.
That’s completely okay now and then. But when you’ve had continuous unavoidable stress for a month or so, now and then can become quite often.
And if I’m being completely honest, years ago it probably would have been white bread, milk chocolate and Diet Coke. So maybe sourdough grain bread, 90% dark chocolate and kombucha is progress!
In the past, I probably would have been quite mean to myself about all of this.
Oh my God, you’re hopeless. Why can’t you keep going? Why do you always revert back to those old behaviours?
But when I look at it properly, my fallback now is actually very different from what it would have been years ago. There have definitely been stressful periods in the past when basically everything I normally did for my health would have disappeared.
That doesn’t seem to happen so dramatically anymore.
I walk. I eat my healthy breakfast. I still move. I still manage some exercise, even if it isn’t the ‘ideal’.
And I think that’s a bit of a win.
So, rather than only focusing on what has fallen away, I’ve been thinking about what I’ve learned and what I could do differently next time.
Because of course, there will be a next time.
Rather than having a plan based on everything going perfectly, I want to work out what is realistic when my energy levels are low and my stress levels are high.
Maybe instead of aiming for a salad five or six times a week, I aim for two. Maybe I still do my two strength sessions, but choose easier go-to workouts. Maybe I add one 20-minute indoor cycling session.
Sleep has been another big one. I’ve been sleeping terribly and most of my usual sleep hygiene has disappeared too. So perhaps my Minimum Viable Action next time is simply a one-minute guided meditation before bed.
None of these things are huge.
They’re just a little bit more than I’m managing when things get really hard at the moment.
I’m sharing my ideas here. Yours, of course, will probably be completely different.
We’re women over 50. We have decades of experiences, behaviours, reactions and habits behind us. It can be really hard not to revert back to familiar things when we’re stressed, tired or overwhelmed.
I think there needs to be some self-compassion around that.
But I also believe we can change things. Yes, it might take time and it might start with really tiny steps, but we can gradually create habits and strategies that stay with us even when life gets messy.
I’m not expecting to handle the next stressful period perfectly.
Maybe next time I’ll eat those two salads. Maybe I’ll get my two strength sessions done. Maybe I’ll do that one-minute meditation each night before bed.
If I manage one or two things a little differently next time, I’ll take that as another win.
And for me, that’s part of creating an effortlessly energised life. Creating a way of living that can adapt when life gets hard, without completely falling apart.
I’d love to know what your go-tos are when you’re going through stressful times.
Maybe you have your own version of my bread, chocolate and kombucha?
Shine bright
Tania