I’ve just returned from a fantastic three-week trip to New Zealand with my 79-year-old mum. She’s wanted to visit New Zealand for decades, and I’m so grateful I could finally make it happen for her – especially after our original plans last November were cancelled the day before we were due to leave (thanks to her catching COVID for the first time).
Although I speak to my mum almost daily and visit her regularly in the regional town where she lives, I hadn’t spent this much uninterrupted time with her since I left home at 17 to work in the city. So this trip was a beautiful opportunity to create some truly special memories.
What really stood out for me during our time together was just how intuitive my mum is when it comes to her health and wellbeing. She’s never read a health book, hasn’t studied nutrition or wellness, doesn’t do any formal exercise, and has never been on a diet in her life.
And yet – she doesn’t take any medication, has maintained a stable weight her whole life and her health markers are consistently good. (Okay, she does get high blood pressure at the doctor, but after several 24-hour monitoring tests, it turns out she just has ‘white coat syndrome’ – her blood pressure spikes at appointments but is otherwise totally fine.)
As someone who spent decades not being so intuitive with my health – following all the diets, fads, extremes (both ends!), and struggling with my weight for years – it was fascinating to observe how naturally and effortlessly my mum operates.
Here are a few things that really stood out to me about how she’s managed to age well:
- She’s naturally active. Mum doesn’t do formal workouts, but she moves all day. She’s not someone who sits still for long, and on our trip, we easily clocked up over 20,000 steps most days. We even did a 10km hike to a glacial lake at Mt Cook – no training, no fuss and she handled it beautifully.
- She eats mindfully and stops when she’s had enough. It sounds simple, but as someone who can inhale food without pausing or recognising fullness, this was a big one for me to witness. She eats slowly, enjoys her food and just… stops when she has had enough. No drama, no internal debate.
- She prefers simple food. Rich or heavily processed food just don’t generally appeal to her. While travelling, this meant being quite conscious about food choices. We usually ate out just once a day and kept things simple otherwise (fresh fish off the trawler with salad in Auckland was a highlight). We carried breakfast basics and always had fruit on hand.
- She enjoys treats – without going overboard. Mum likes a bit of chocolate, cake and ice cream but she naturally stops when she’s satisfied. She doesn’t eat an entire block of chocolate (unlike me sometimes…!). Again, it’s her intuitive relationship with food that’s stands out – something many of us lose through years of dieting and restriction.
- Even at buffets, she chooses what she likes – mostly simple, mostly healthy – not out of restriction, but because it’s what feels good for her.
- She has her own quirky wind-down ritual. Sharing a room for three weeks, I discovered that after saying goodnight, she starts doing this deep breathing thing (kind of like a weird Darth Vader sound!) I asked what on earth it was and she said she didn’t know why but it helps her fall asleep. Essentially, she’s intuitively slowing her breath, calming her nervous system and doing a kind of meditative practice – without even realising. (Meanwhile, I’ve spent years and a small fortune learning mindfulness techniques!)
- She honours her body’s rhythm. Mum gets enough sleep and listens to her body. If she’s tired, she will rest and go to bed earlier. She also wakes up early, starts her day gently and becomes more active as the day goes on, winding down naturally in the evening. It’s beautifully simple and remarkably effective.
Watching her move through her days reminded me just how much wisdom exists in consistency, simplicity and body awareness. She hasn’t disrupted her metabolism with decades of dieting, she hasn’t overcomplicated her wellness with trends, and yet she’s still thriving – strong, active, and healthy.
I often catch myself telling mum that she “should” be doing strength training or eating more protein, or following some of the science-backed strategies I use with myself and my clients. But then I take a step back and look at her life. She may not lift weights in a gym, but she’s regularly lifting and getting up and down from the floor with her energetic 2 and 4 year-old grandkids, mows her own lawns, and keeps her (very clean!) house in shape. As I often say, your body does not know if you are pushing a weight at a gym or a lawn mower in your yard – it simply needs to move in a variety of ways, lift things that are a bit heavy and have adequate recovery time.
Final thoughts
This trip was a wonderful reminder that good health and ageing well doesn’t always come from doing more or the latest ‘thing’ – but from doing what feels aligned and sustainable. My mum’s vitality isn’t the result of perfect routines or biohacks – it’s the product of listening to her body, honouring her needs and keeping things simple.
In a world full of noise about what we should be doing, her example was a powerful lesson: longevity and health isn’t just about fancy strategies – it’s about consistency, intuition and simplicity. Sometimes, the best health wisdom isn’t found in books – it’s passed down through, role modelling, shared stories and lived experience.
I’m super grateful to still have my mum in my life to pass her wisdom on to me.
Shine bright
Tania