It’s that time of year again. One of sadness and also reflection.
Next Tuesday will be 31 years since my dad died of sudden heart attack aged 47 – no previous symptoms, no warning, he just died, alone at our farm. I was 24 at the time, had never even been to a funeral (my grandparents were all still alive) and I found myself organising my dad’s funeral (my mum was in major shock). I’m not sure why but selecting the flowers to go on top of his coffin was the very worst part of the process – just writing those words now, I can still feel the absolute horrendous sickness in my stomach I felt back then.
It was a traumatic and challenging time and one that has impacted the trajectory of my life since.
My dad’s death has got me thinking a lot lately, especially when I was out for lunch on the weekend and a friend shared that her husband had been diagnosed with cancer. She mentioned that he was prepared to change his life to try to fight for his life – he is prepared to drink all the green juices and be as healthy as possible to give himself the best chance possible. I’m sure if my dad had survived his heart attack, that he may have changed his life as well.
And, that’s the thing. Often it takes a catastrophic health event for people to start actually prioritising their health, valuing their health and understanding that investing in their health is the most important investment they can make. Without health, the alternative could be the unfathomable.
But no one thinks it will happen to them. (Honestly, I naively even still find myself thinking it couldn’t happen to me!)
I never thought what happened to my dad could ever happen to a ‘normal’ family like mine – but it did. And, my family’s life is still adversely impacted in so many ways, all these decades later.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my own health and wellness.
Although I consider myself relatively healthy, I still have things to work on. I still don’t prioritise my health as much as I want to. I still find myself working too late at night (often sending emails to clients talking about them prioritising their health!), coming up with a million and one excuses as to why I’m not eating quite the way I would like and why I’m sometimes still in my exercise gear at the end of the day but haven’t made time to exercise!
I had a sleepless night recently and all I could think about was, what if I was diagnosed with a life threatening disease tomorrow? How would that change things? What would I do?
And, you know what, I know exactly what I would do. I would do all the things. All the things that I talk about but sometimes don’t do myself! Overnight, I would be able to implement the changes that seem so hard to create. I’d do whatever was necessary to give myself the best chance of surviving and being able to see my children as adults and possibly even their children.
I know I’m not alone.
I hear about these things often. Someone may get a diabetes diagnosis, have a heart attack or something that provides enough of a scare that is incentive enough to change their life. I know someone who gave up a long-term smoking habit immediately after a heart scare and has never smoked since.
What will it take for you?
If you are someone who wants to lead a healthier life but just can’t seem to create the habits necessary, then, what will it take for you? What are you waiting for?
Personally, I don’t want to wait for a catastrophic health event. I want to give myself the very best chance of living a healthy life without that. I’ve never been in hospital (apart from childbirth) and I don’t want that to be the reason for me to truly start prioritising my health and putting myself at the top of my to do list.
I’ll be thinking about my Dad next week.
Wishing he was here. Hoping that he would be proud of the path I took (personal training and now health coaching) after his death and wondering, if he had lived, whether we might be meeting up for a swim next week – something we did together for a while when I was a teenager and I loved. Perhaps I’ll go for a swim to mark this anniversary – it’s been on my to do list for a while now and I think it’s time to make it a regular part of my life again.
No more waiting.
Tania
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